They said its twenty twenty TOO haha

Well of course, as usual , my introduction for every post for the past two years has been pretty constant and the same - Been. A. While. 

How even we’re in 2020 too ( pun intended ) already…

I cant believe it myself that I am telling everyone hi I am Anis I am 28 this year? Felt surreal and in denial too. Until and unless we reach the fifth month of the year , I shall be deemed and remain as 27 years old. 

I had a very hectic start in 2022. Even at the very moment I am writing this down , I am still weighed down by the hecticness, never felt so happy that its finally weekend ( tipuuuu haha ) , okay I am always happy when its weekend, but now I am extra happy haha…

These creatures made my day hehe

 I has pretty laid back schedule for the last three months of 2021 which it has given me lots of ample time to get things especially the files I took over , sorted, done and dusted. 

Some day those three free months were my mere past. Adjusting to the schedule , understanding the pace , re learning the style took a lot of me. My emotions were tested. I was angry with myself and the whole awkward setting  , to which I realized if it continues to stay as hatred and revenge , it will bring more harm than good. So I had to learn to let go. Letting go is one thing , pretending that I am okay in that phase is another thing. Affer a while, I am getting the hang of it, I am able to make peace with whatever discomfort I am dealing with at the moment. Okay we good ? Yes we good 

I wish to put it here in writing , as it seems deserving to be here , last week it was on the 17th of January 2022 at 1.18 am I received a text , reminding me that we hit two years together. 104 weeks down the road, many Jumaat since his first introductory message conveying his intention to know me. It was really beautiful as no one ever noticed such small detail about me, about how I wanted people to slide into my DM. It was his thoughtfullness and his sensitivity towards the things that went unnoticed most of the time, caught my attention. We grew , we fought , we come back along the way, we hit out lowest , we stayed , we talked and we grew comfortable at sharing some silent moments , acknowldeging each others presence. I never thought  can last this long , but he was willing to stay, not as simple as just staying but actively providing comfort , making me feel loved and the independent me was allowed , welcomed and cherished to be at my lowest ie needy etc . It felt like, a safe space.

I don’t know who will read through this but if you’re reading, can you spare some time to have us in your prayers, that Allah will unite us soon , legally for the life and hereafter. That ‘we’ are indeed predestined for each other, written for each other. 

Surely 2021 was a hell ride of year, countless times in self isolation , pretty mundane nine months in lock down, it was only on October onwards, things started to change , readjusting new norms, trying to get back into life pre Covid. Of course it was never the same again , but getting back into the routine was essential. Many were demotivated , affected negatively ; which I hope there is always light at the end of the tunnel for everyone , that the light will keep them moving and accomodating them along the way. 

I am glad I am back here for a moment. Reminds me of myself. That I enjoyed writing. 

Till then xx

Love, the'ann