#throwback Checklist and Settling down here.

Hello , so someone requested this !

yayerzzz I have a reason to procrastinate with my assignment ! bahaha nayyl it ( nail it ) , I am half way through done so I guess I can write this post ( happily )

What did I brought here last time , hmm soalan ni insyaAllah lagi senang dari soalan " Nak makan mana hari ni? " * soalan habis kelas kat intec dulu haha. 

I went to a predepature programme ( JOM - Journey Of a Muslim ) and they did provide a checklist on what to bring / not . I do have a  soft copy of that , anyone yang rasa nak , you can email me , so I can email it to you. :) 

Now lets start ! 

Okay , kita jawab part senang dulu , where to get the winter coats , boots and etc?

Last time dari Malaysia , I only bring a piece of sweater berwarna merah yang dibeli di bundle. Yes bundle. Since I spent my predepature money for my phone , I insist of buying just a sweater from the bundle store for RM 5.00 though sebenarnya penat Puan Nurul cadangkan baju sejuk from this traveller store and yknow I had trouble seeking for my size dekat store store macam ni , so to make myself feel accepted and happy ( because eventually I can get my size in bundle so my mom turutkan je kayh ) 

see the bundle sweater , its been so helpful , sekarang dah tak pakai sangat sweater tu kat luar tapi masa nak tidur , if its cold , I'll wear that sweater. * drama nangis sweater berjasa *

masih boleh pakai jubah masa datang awal awal dulu sebab its sunny , and early autumn . So bolehlah tak sejuk sangat. 

I did packed like 2 sweater ( tak tebal mana pun ) and a blazer I bought habis Alevels dulu and guess what? I LEFT THEM IN MALAYSIA SINCE MY BAG MASA TIMBANG KAT KLIA WAS LIKE BERAT GILA AND I REDHA ( menangis tidak berlagu ) hahahahah k benda ni sangat lawak dan memaksa kepala membuat keputusan. Masa packing en takde pulak fikir nak tinggalkan apa semua , sebab memang dah sedia maklum beg berat gila dengan segala perencah makanan semua. Tapi bila dah timbang and bila officer KLIA kata beg melebihi muatan , and i f I insisted nak bawak semua, I need to pay like a near 1000 for that. 

Did I pay , NAY NOT ! ( when it comes to money , my mind was forced for quick decision ) ( sambil menyorok tepi kaunter keluarkan barang barang dari beg , I nangis y'olss sambil gelabah sebab pakai blazer panas gilaaaaih ) 

jadi terpaksa aku relakan tinggal blazer ( sambil menyanyi lagu hindostang ) , tinggalkan 2 sweater ( yang aku yakin dia tak mampu menangkis kesejukan bumi kambing lebih banyak dari manusia ni haha ) and some of the spices termasuk maggi ayam ( yang kat sini pun boleh jumpa takde hal haha ) and a pair of shoes ( shoes ni sedih sikit tinggalkan )

so , as a conclusion , just datang sini dengan hati yang terbuka , you shall get all the winter thingy here with a cheaper price ( even after convert , they'll be much cheaper ! ) , so tidak perlu bersungguh beli barang winter dari Malaysia. Bolehlah bersungguh seperti hakak beli earmuff dan sarung tangan daiso konon comel sampai sini tak pakai pakai ahhahahahahah weh serious. 

Sebabnya as a Malaysia , truly asian ( sambil menyanyi lagu tourism malaysia ) , you can still bare early autumn weather masa datang sini. Kalau tak bare sekalipun , you can cepat cepat pi City and grab a coat , like 20 pound camtu. Even murah lagi pun ada. Tapi since my size is not that universal , I invested like 40++ for my coat yang shower resistant , ( which is worth it sebab Cardiff selalu hujan ).

Tapi kalau nak beli like inner or thighs , akak sarankan beli sesiap dekat Malaysia since it cost cheaper , kalau thermal wear ( yang real thermal ) beli sini kot. 

Okay panjang akak jawab. * jentik diri sendiri *

Lets move on dengan kehidupan ,checklist? 

Okay apa yang akak rasa penting dekat sini , melalui pengalaman dua bulan aicewah gaya lapan tahun , apa yang penting dekat sini shall be , things yang susah dapat kat sini. Apa yang susah dapat? Jangan risau , maggi asam laksa yang Istanbul Aku Datang kata boleh dapat kat Malaysia je , menipu semata , I saw one ( a lot ) in a halal meat store last few days haha. 

Since I selalu masak ( takdelah selalu , tapi masaklah ) , for me , kiub ikan bilis penting. Ikan bilis juga penting. Okay meh sat I list apa yang penting :

1. Stationery ( especially pena menulis haha ) oh ini serious pen sangat mahal dekat sini ( selepas convert ) ahhaha , tak serious , beli 1 pound for a pen adalah sangat tak berbaloi where its like RM 5.00 for a pen yang tak berkualiti even the rule is never to convert , trust me this part worth converting and thinking haha. Since I'm doing law and doing notes traditionally , pen adalah sangattttttttt penting beli bebanyak dari Malaysia , lagi lagi orang yang ada personal preferences for pen ( like me ) haha.  Notebook pun boleh gak consider nak bawak. It might help with your reduction in your allowances used. 

I swear I bawak the biggest bag and the small bag in cabin. Lain semua tinggal zzzz. Rindunyaaa rumah :'((

2. Perencah makanan dan mungkin juga maggi. ! contoh : rempah kari , kunyit dan mungkin nasi goreng perencah yang tak berapa diterima tekak. haha. ergh naaayh. I did bring a lot perencah nasi goreng and end up akan buat dari raw which taste , acceptable. Bawang dan kengkawan insyaAllah jumpa je dekat sini. You might also think of bringing daun kari , daun limau purut , bawak datang sini freeze everything and you can use it ( even presentation daun dah layu , the essence from the leaves that we need ! haha untuk masak paprik , tomyam nyam nyam ) . Cili kering pun macam penting. Keropok keropok Malaysia keropok ikan ke apa ke , even you macam tak berapa nak crave , you can consider bringing it here , because far away , you may found yourself crying at night teringat keropok ikang Malaysia wahahah. Santan insyaAllah sini boleh dapat , tapi bawak je aaa kot. Perencah cepat masak seperti asam pedas , nasi ayam , rendang ke , worth buying I guess. Sebab kita mungkin menjadi malas secara tetiba dan end up makan maggi leuls. haha. 

yang dalam PusaGol tu is cili kering , which my mum and my aunt transform it through sambal kering ( yang still exist sampai sekarang ) and its like very useful sebab ada rasa kasih sayang mak dan makcik tudiaaaaa haha. Sekarang yang asam pedas , nasi ayam dah takde T.T ( dah selamat di dalam peruts ) haha

this masa awal awal dulu ( me and my housemates punya barang bawak dari Malaysia ) and percayalah perencah yang banyak kat tingkat satu tu , sampai sekarang masih banyak camtu haha.

Oh yeah , banyak banyak maggi , paling worth it beli maggi tomyam banyak banyak banyakkk sebab tak jumpa kat sini I isz sad. 

kiub ayam ,kaya Malaysia sangat hahah.  Yang dalam plastic bungkin bungkus tu ikan bilis , ikan kering , sambal , udang kering , yesssss udang kering penting ! sini mahal and sikit. 
* semua gambar throwback habis masa baru masuk rumah *

3. Girls , bring enough tudung , shawl or something so that you wont shop here. Hahah heyy beli shawl satu 10 pound equivalent to like RM 50++  Malaysia , you can spend that 10 pound beli ayam raw 2 ekor dan masak untuk beberapa minggu. Hahah ini serious. I brought like all colours here ( but usually end up dengan satu tudung yang sama I dont care haha ) . 

4. This should be on the first priority actually , but since I am sorting points based on what I see infront me , and eventually I tulis post ni dekat meja study ( nampak stationery dulu ) , pusing kepala ke belakang , eh telekung , sejadah ! and yes , Al- Quran , bawa semua ini dari Malaysia since I hardly see tempat jual sejadah , ada je rasanya dekat Islamic stores but bawak aaa senang , being a Malaysian , telekung for girls kinda important en , even sebenarnya kalau kat sini biasanya you boleh solat terus since its cold , kita menutup aurat insyaAllah dengan sempurna , dan ada wudhu' senang je solat dekat private rooms nearby. So we have more reasons to dress in proper which boleh terus bawak solat , yeayyy !

5. Basic things like towels , berus gigi , bawak dulu the mini pack since to survive a day or two before you can go shop or something. 

6. For sponsored students , I encourage you guys to siap siap convert amount yang sponsor bakal bagi , in my case , its JPA , they give like in a bulk to survive till December , in RM. What I did last time I convert those RM to pound in a bank draft . Benda ni just go to you bank ( mine is CIMB Bank ) and ask them how to do it. Learn by experiences guys ! which I must say sangat worth it and senang buat bank draft ni , since my parents are busy and susah nak transfer duit monthly semua , which can be costly to us since on transaction boleh charge us with like RM 30.00 macam tu. I did receive some threats and reminders bila orang cakap pakai bank draft ni bahaya fraud semua , my advise, PEDULI SEMUA ORANG CAKAP APA ! ( mood api terbakar di kepala ) like seriously masa I buat bank draft dekat CIMB tu they said nothing and even encourage me to do the bank draft , without the worry of fraud or whatever the rumours spread ! . I did worry and cuak bila rumours ni ada semua , but now , I guess I did a right decision dulu . Sebab bank draft ni tak affected dengan fluctuating rates. Camne tah , google aaa kot kalau rasa nak tahu. Eheeee. 

pengajaran , kita kena kenkadang jadi degil dan peduli orang cakap apa , do what you feel convenient to you .

7. Ubat ubatan . Like balm , pill cekketekaun ( camne nak eja ni hahah ) , panadol ke , make sure you bring maybe compatible medicine dengan you. Since masa I arrived here , I had trouble dealing with the weather , cold weather to be specific , so to have medicine in your list is a must ! Takyah bawak banyak mungkin , train yourself to heal through natural process like drinking waters and rest , sebab depending to medicine doesnt seems good kot. 

8. If you wonder about electronics stuff , I did bring laptop , a smart phone , and my dumb yet precious phone with a music companion function with all the cables, and yeah dengan powerbank. I was advised to brought them all from Malaysia sebab apparently everything i s cheaper in Malaysia + the free stuff you get from your purchase. Hahaha. sini semua sell in separate , even lampu tidur , come without the bulb , you must be sad with this fact ! ahahahha. 

and if you wonder, " Ada tak allowance for laptop ? "
The answer , for JPA , takde , ( by mean not specifically stated tapi you can aaaa kot spend sikit dari predepature punya duit for that ) . And if you're wondering how many JPA bagi , and how the allowances sectioned , you can email me , I may provide the list privately. Kot. 

What did I miss? Did I miss any? If there's any , let me know , then I'll mend this point , with " Ahaaaa terlupaa satu " sambil buat muka monyet tutup mulut hahahhahahahhaha kbye. 

I hope this help , sorry for the emotion breakdown through the post. I am a woman. With hormones. Hahah I can't help but its hormone. * salahkan hormone * ahahahha.

adios.amigos. 

Sahabat Sejati.


sebelum baca ( kalaulah nak baca ) sebelum nyanyi gaya tone deaf ( kalaulah nak nyanyi ) bukak link ni dan nyanyi bersama hahaha ini lagu bukan sajak. Saya belum dapat mood nak karang sajak lima enam bait haha . Sahabat Sejati - K bukan Inteam , UNIC HAHA 

Ku biar kalam berbicara
Menghurai maksudnya di jiwa
Agar mudah ku mengerti
Segala yang terjadi
Sudah suratan Ilahi

Ku biarkan pena menulis
Meluahkan hasrat di hati
Moga terubat segala
Keresahan di jiwa
Tak pernah ku ingini

Aku telah pun sedaya
Tak melukai hatimu
Mungkin sudah suratan hidupku
Kasih yang lama terjalin
Berderai bagaikan kaca
Oh teman, maafkanlah diriku

C/O :
Oh Tuhan
Tunjukkan ku jalan
Untuk menempuhi dugaan ini
Teman, maafkan jika ku melukaimu
Moga ikatan ukhwah yang dibina
Ke akhirnya

Aku tidak kan berdaya
Menahan hibanya rasa
Kau pergi meninggalkan diriku
Redhalah apa terjadi
Usahlah kau kesali
Mungkin ada rahmat yang tersembunyi

I don't know but this keep playing inside my head ( plus I kept playing it through my playlist ngeh padanlah berputar di kepala ) . Tapi yeah Inteam terima kasih nyanyi nasyid ni. Voilaaa lama gilaaa rindu nak dengar nasyid. Sebab nasyid buat diri ni ingat Selandar. 

By the way junior last time aku form 5 , diaorang form 2 , dah habis dah SPM * claps * which indicates masa berlalu sangat pantas bagi mereka sebab they eventually see the changes through years while me , macam rasa whats happening in this three years exactly weh !?!? * nyanyi nasyid di atas *


Sejuk.

I am never a cold tolerant , from a cold person to the cold weather. Meh kaitan. Haha.
Semalam -1' celcius kat sini. Sejuk sampai duvett tak mampu menangkis kesejukan di bumi Cardiff ini. The laziness to walk from the house to the class starts to show ( namun jangan risau , aku masih kental menempuh jalan menuntut ilmu kerana sejuk itu penghalang orang orang yang lemah aicewah  ) , sebab macam terketar redah jalan 15 minit macam tu dan selalunya aku akan macam " woi kenapa sejuk sangat ni " dan muka ditampar angin sepoi sepoi bahasa " woiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii " bertambah panjang sambil mengincit ( melompat dua cm dari tanah secara berulang kali sambil dua tangan dalam coat - bayangkan ) - woi ditujukan kepada diri sendiri yang degil malas nak pakai thermal wear , dia ingat ni Malaysia hagaknya.  
Cakap pasal Malaysia ,  
Teringat Malaysia , aku baru sedar khatulistiwa tu satu kurnian Tuhan yang amat berharga. Tudiaaaa. Haha ye , sejuk ada panas ada lembab ada muka berminyak ada. eh. Hahah sini muka berminyak dah diganti dengan muka menggelupas. I is sedih.  Haha serius ni. Itu belum lagi aku amaze dengan mat mat salleh dengan kebolehan memakai baju yang nyata tak tahan sejuk . Aku dah masuk thermal wear , lengkap semua head to toe , masih merasakan cuaca berlaku kejam terhadap diri ini. Mungkin , aku Asia sejati. 
 bukan aku je tak tahan sejuk. Malah rumput juga begitu. Maka adakah aku rumput? Oh tidak , aku tanah. * tetiba * hahah.

Fall into places.

 I guess weekend , before Subuh is always the best time to rant on and reflect though I might question myself why I am awake at this hour. I dedicate my weekend for myself , myself considers blogging - and self treating ( though making yourself in debt with sleeping , is not a good kind of treat but nayyl ( read ; nail ) it. haha. )

By the way , Its been my TWO MONTHS here in United Kingdom !

Tadi pergi stalk instagram orang lepas penat buat tutorial contract. Lols I even allow myself to talk about this thing again. Its like supeeeeeeeeeeeeeer a lot I can't even brain why , its only an hour class and my answers for only two questions are like 14 15 pages. Maybe sebab masuk sekali tulisan cakar kambing haha. Okay back to stalking instagram . Pastu nampaklah some people deleted old pictures which yeah kinda cool je remove past pictures ( mende cool najwa mendeee ) haha. And I decided to remove some of the pictures in my instagram account. 

After filtering , tak mampu nak delete banyak pun sebab menitik beratkan personality diri sendiri yang selalu suka reflect on past and naturally loving history ( ini doubtful sikit , shubhah miahaha ) . 

And yeah bila dah scroll gambar gambar lama , its like the fold of memories , with hopes ( because I usually prefer long captions because I am no good with deep pictures that tell its own stories. ) dengan hashtag bagai semua seperti #CardiffUniversity #AlevelsResult #Cuaks soon and it was like 40 weeks ago , and finally here I am in Cardiff , reading law. Seeing how things fall into places ( aligned to what I hope , what I dream off , what I feared off ) , I guess tons of alhamdulillah would never express my gratitude dekat Allah yang ease through everything. 

  

hasil stalk diri sendiri miahahahhahha.


Like finishing Alevels yang rasa sama , having the same kind of packing pictures every semester , finally completed with the last packing in semester four , ups and downs receiving the semester results , the emotion dealing with packed trial exams , then the days hadap buku laptop two four seven ( bahahahahhaha nak study siap ambik gambar dulu , mau kena hempuk diri sendiri haha ) - pastu Alevels habis , then the BTN part , and the processes from A to Z for the university application , missing some parts ( pictures to be specific ) masa down gilaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa result pending ( I am in no mood to capture that moment ) and tadadada kita pendekkanlah cerita ni haha dah kat sini. Lols !

iols busy sikit sekarang haha. ( picture take at the National Museum , London )


Hah camtu je conclusion kau? 

Nayy. Nope nope. 

Sebenarnyalah kan , bila go through balik benda tu , at the moment lets just say masa tu post gambar Mood Trials , bersama muka yang sememeh dan sedih , I just don't know would I be able to go through trials ni? And like months after , keluar result with caption Alhamdulillah , worth the while semua. Like seriously we never know whether we're capable of doing it at that moment , tapi bila kita flip back the timeline , you just know ,

you've make it ! * pat bahu *

Flying off to United Kingdom is kind of a big project / change / route within myself. Sebab the fact I am older and I noticed stuff and realized I have a responsibility and it it involves efforts with countless of hopes and dreams as everything is not certain . Because semesters exam tak bagi kesan pada gred akhir and you yourself know , its not easy. Never easy. And kalau nak dihitung balik how the journey goes to get a picture of Malaysia Airlines punya ticket ( nak insta punya pasal bahaha ) , sumpahlah tak senang , naik turun KL gaya KL Melaka sekangkang semut. Because dinosours might be as big as Malaysia bahahahaha hiperbola kenapa. 

Tapi everything ( melihat dari sudut pandang sekarang - memandang hari hari yang lepas ) do fall into places and Allah did ease me through the uncertain route. Finally rasa macam jalan dalam fridge hari hari , setelah hari hari panaih-gila-shah-alam-apakah dilalui dengan penuh tabah , hari hari bas-intec-hanya-berhenti-dekat-Petronas-kat-luar-kena-jalan-masuk-akasia-mengapaaaaa , now kat Cardiff naik bas pun tak reti , sebab hari hari orang jalan kaki. hahah. I don't know but a 30 minute walk is considered worth walking. And kira dah macam normal kind of walk. Kot. Sebab sejuk semua. Namun begitu , my dreams to be in a cold weather everyday , now is not a dream anymore , and kadang tu excited macam beruk bila nampak matahari panas , mengeluarkan haba. Haha because overtimes the sun shines with no heat , Yu got meyh? Tambah dengan my skin got so dry , I guess my skin is not a cold weather tolerant , guane nak kahwin mat salleh ni?

Nayyy I was kidding I prefer Malays. Malay guys. ey. 

And that makes me ponder , kira macam sekarang en , my biggest concerns ( est with many concernS ) are my law degree and my in the making of solehah excellent caliph daughter wife to be eyy ( its like shooting a bird with one arrow ) mondo peribahasa awak najwa. And for now , this might seems hard and I am having this war inside me whether I am capable to do this here , lasting for three years here ? 

I hope one day , I'll look back and did say , " Alhamdulillah , everything FALLS INTO PLACES "

Adios

The Skin and I

I am not usually this concern well not really but then since my skin [ focus on the face part ] started to get so dry because of the weather , well dry alone shall be fine since I hate it to be oily however the skin started to peel off like the snake's skin and I isz very sad.

There's this one day I felt so dizzy and I apply my minyak angin at my side forehead hahahaahah silalah bayangkan kat mana and its like burning and the next morning I saw it actually burn the skin and once again I isz sad.

Taktahu cemanaaaaa nak buat ni. I bought a skin care from body shop , I don't know if the reaction I am facing now is considered as normal as the beginner but then I am scared that it gets worse than this.

there goes my sad story between me and my ( face ) skin.

My Men-Women Relationship.

Sampai satu masa kita akan lalu fasa dah malas nak seek for relationship sebab kita rasa kita dah lepas fasa awak-tengah-buat/makan/minum/buat/makan/minum-apa dan mungkin dah masa untuk prepare diri sendiri untuk benda yang lebih serius. Yang selari dengan tuntutan agama . Dan mungkin juga umur. Mungkin.

I lessen my talk-to-boys sejak masuk INTEC. Sebab dah rasa malas dan mungkin jugak takde siapa nak approach bahahahha well I don't care since I've decided yang dekat INTEC dah mula fasa tersedar dari mimpi dan nak berusaha bukan pada kata kata tapi usaha yang betul betul usaha. Jadi lelaki dikira sebagai benda yang menghalang hahaha sebab diri sendiri mengakui yang opposite gender boleh buat diri ni jadi leka and dragged . No offence , because this fact applies to me. So I did read my past diaries yang I just want to put this one guy ( in the past ) in my heart and that's it ! 

Gradually as time passes by , I never know whether the one whom I put in my heart , is very into my liking or its just acting as merely a shield from me seeing other guys. And I got confused overtimes and sometimes I guess he's the one but the other time he was just a past , a history that lives in me. Its only after years , I decided to leave it behind , believing that he was just a past / a memory , a good memory indeed. And because it's 'good' in every sense , that's why at the first place I let the memory of him stays inside me. 

Though I need to admit , its hard to seek for the reality that beat the 'good' memory. Still , I know that he might not be the one and probably not the one. When I say THE ONE , I guess you'd know that I'm talking about all kind of jodoh related. 

Susah sebenarnya nak cari masa untuk go deep dengan diri sendiri. Sebab rasa macam dah really growing up ( in the sense of love motion ) . And bila nak cakap pun , rasa macam dah tak boleh pergi dengan lovey dovey ni. Durrrhhh ~ ~ ~

Overtimes I would find myself stalking couples . And kejap tu pulak , bila dah macam envy pasangan yang tak halal , rasa macam dosa pastu stalk pulak orang yang dah kahwin. Hahahaha you know what's even burdening to me? Tengok orang get married at the very early age and knowing you have no one now. 

Well many could say " Kau ada family , ada tuhan , ada semua benda kecuali a lover " , can I just pull your hair? Or pick one of your nose hair or something? ( tukar nada membaca dengan laju dan berakhir dengan gelak macam orang gila dan end up dengan tangisan dalam gelak ) Because that one lover could matter most when you're seeing an old couple holding hands in the middle of the shopping complex and you can even blame your eye sight for choosing that kind of sight and I is sad. and because what they say is all true that you can't never deny the truth and you'll end up crying sambil melayan sisa gelak haha ) 

Huh. 

And you find yourself at the end of the endless thoughts / notes / a blog post - believing that one day will come. That the one you've been fantasizing after years ( and they might not even meet your fairy tale criteria ) will turn up because we've been fed with this all happily-ever-after ending. Cerita dia is kena sabar. Kot. Bukan kot. Tapi memang kena sabar. 

I guess I've been dumping jodoh-motion prayers dalam solat. Dah lupa nak mintak dengan Allah nak suami soleh kaya hensem romantik semua. Sebab dah banyak kali go through An-Nur ( surah ke 24 ) yang Perempuan yang baik untuk lelaki yang baik , dan juga sebaliknya. Instead kajang berjela ciri ciri suami , dah masa untuk kita mintak Allah jadikan kita ( diri sendiri ) jadi lebih baik dari segenap segi , dan kita dah tak payah nak risau dengan siapa yang Allah pairkan untuk kita. Aicewah gaya kahwin tahun lepas ( emoticon muka monyet tutup mulut ) 

Mungkin boleh kot campak nota untuk yang bakal menempuh perhubungan complicated dengan diri ini miahahahhahahhahaha ( gelak seperti syaiton majalah Asuh )

Hai. Haha awkward kan nak kata hai? Mehlah saya tukar jadi Assalamualaikum awak ( ayat ayat cinta petala bawah teras bumi ) . Meh la tulis dalam English supaya tak awkward pakai saya awak ana anti antunna semua haha. Hey , I guess since I'm not in the mood of searching you , I guess and I hope you're not seeking for me now. ( tapi kalau nak cari jugak secara aktif , teruskan , takde hal , malah saya lagi suka haha - I like surprises well all girls , or majority of my species fancy surprise hahahahahha )
Mungkin kita dua tengah ada priority yang lebih besar , jaga dulu apa yang dikendong , takut bila dikejar ( jangan risau saya species selalu tak lepas sukantara bab bab 100 400 metre hahahaha lawak la tu? ) tercicir pula apa yang dikendong tu , ye doks? ( tolonglah kata awak gelak sebab saya akan selalu buat lawak lagi hambar dari ni dan sampai satu masa awak boleh confuse nak gelak ke nak marah lawak lawak saya ; tudiaaaaaa gaya macam sweet en? haha ) . ( tapi betul yang saya punya hambar mengundang ketukan senduk di dapur. )

ketahuilah yang awak ada jugak dalam gambar ! Cuma dalam hati. HAHA OKAY AWAK SAYA TIPU ( sambil gelak rabbit )
Okay , serious ni kejap , be good always , people do mistakes , so do I , so dalam fasa kita belum dijumpakan ni , lets make ourselves better for each other - let us repent on our mistakes  , better for the religion , so that later we'll build a family which is even double tripple better in every sense insyaAllah. 
I guess I've grown up and stop putting criteria about how you look , how you supposed to behave semua , because I know if I do good , Allah bagi yang sama level insyaAllah. Saya dah tahap redha bila kita akan jumpa , bila sebenarnya timing tu , jumpa atau tidak kita ni di dunia. Lets keep the left notes dalam kepala saya bila kita nanti jumpa. Jaga diri awak. Serious jaga diri. Lets always be in each other dua's , though our dua only talk about the anonymous , to be always in dua's , I certainly know , its love.

( mood baru lepas tengok My Love From the Star )

Kota London dan kenangan

So I invented a travel diary well I named it #TheAnisNajwaMusafir , I've thought about it for quite sometime , travel log - travel diary - '' adventure sounds too common , so I decided to go with #TheAnisNajwaMusafir ( I should put up a column here later for that )

Truth to be told , I enjoyed being at home more than travelling but since I am here , to say no to travelling sounds er irrelevant? Because nanti kalau insyaAllah jadi nenek nenek nanti , my grandchildren might ask me , " Dulu nenda belajar UK kan? Travel pergi mana je? " WOULD I DARE TO EVEN SAY , " Nayy nenda travel back and forth dari pintu bilik rumah nenda ke dapur everyday " NO ! I don't want to be that lameeeee ~ ~

So there you go , my very first destination outside Wales - outside Cardiff to be specific ; London !

The original plan is just to follow my housemate who're meeting her father ( sebab ayah dia travel pi Istanbul and stop by London to pay us a visit and bagi barang barang kiriman dari Malaysia ).

I'm not really in the mood of writing - but I want to write this thing down since rasa kalau tangguh nanti lupa adventure details sepanjang bermusafir lols. Haha. So lets start !

We went to London ( we consist of seven / eight people from Cardiff and Aberyswyth ) by bus. And system dekat sini unlike Malaysia yang ada fix rate of harga tiket bas tak kira beli lambat atau awal , sini lagi awal kita beli , insyaAllah dapat lagi murah. Dia serupa tiket kapal terbang aaa jugak. So we got the ticket ( pergi balik naik Megabus ) for 12 pound. One trip - 6.00 pound. Cheap isn't it? Well for 4 hours of journey I considered that to be , cheap yeah. Well masa pergi tu naik double decker , I guess I am never a big fan of double decker bus , pening nak muntah semua ada , I slept all the way from Cardiff to London since its suffocating ( the seat was freaking small and my short legs cant really move sobs and I sat beside a stranger ) .

it was a small degree of torture for me ! * sampai scheduled planned trip ke Scotland this December tukar plan naik flight instead of seven hours of bus journey *

Sampai sampai London dalam pukul 2.00 camtu , we stayed at a hotel beside Malaysian Hall ( takdelah beside sangat tapi a walking distance aaa ) , we went to the Malaysian Hall first for lunch. Sampai sekarang rasa yang best place I would ever remember and would definitely sanggup redah 4 hours back and forth is the MALAYSIAN HALL ! To be specific is the canteen deng ! haha. Tak boleh nak bayang rasa homie bila nampak nasi campur , asam pedas ikan pari ( woa ) ikan keli ( woaa ) and all kinds of malaysian foods ! ( woaaaa panjang panjang ) . Belum kira dapat air sirap sejuk ( woaaa dua harakat ) . Belum masuk lagi keadaan sekeliling bersama Malaysian , seriously rasa macam dekat kedai Malaysia . You can't help but to feel at ease to be there. Mana jauh kena campak pun , there's always an ease feeling to be close to someone from your country ( I dont know if I am an into-country-verted person haha but I feel at ease ! )

And the hotel was splendid ! its just nice . Lagipun dari Jumaat ke Ahad , dekat hotel cuma untuk solat - rehat kejap - keluar balik - tidur malam . Jumaat tu we spent our time at the Oxford Street. Syorga shopping ! haha. I was fascinated sebab dekat Cardiff  , after 6 camtu dah senyap lagi lagi dekat my are ( Cathays Terrace ) ni - dekat Oxford Street , it was like soooooooooooooooooo busy I tell you. Yeah I jakun serious. Hahah they even started their Christmas mode ( maybe jugak I stayed quite far from the city centre , that I never know how the city looked like after 6 ) . The first day I bought a set of facial care from Body Shop , its not that I don't find one in Cardiff , its because pagi tu my friend tegur my face mengelupas and I was like blergh no. So I did ( finally ) bought a set of facial care for only.... 30 pound hahahahahha kalau convert ringgit , mau nangis 150++ terbang haha.

Nothing much happen on the Friday night , we went to Khan restaurant ( makanan middle east , and as usual , its just don't fit my appetite ) , Cardiff offered wide range of same kind of foods and its not my liking I am just too picky I don't know. Before that , I sat a one of the bench along the road at the Oxford Street while waiting for the group , I only shop in a very short period of time and the excitement fades away once I got what I want ahaha. Memang takde kerja duduk freezing tengah tengah kota London yang sibuk. Aicewahs haha.

The next day , we went to various places ! with one day pass ( for the tube ) , deng this was challenging part 1. But wait , lets list down the places I went to first. I went to ( ready the firework sound ) haha. - The London Eye ( or Eye of London ) haha. - The Big Ben - The London Bridge ( is falling down singing mode ) - China Town - Oxford Street - Buckingham Palace - Palace near the London Bridge - Trafalgar Square ( sorry can't help to recall many of them ) . Well this places requires you to travel from one place to another. I don't know but London is quite busy this weekend with a memorial day where they wear poppy flowers ( the red colour ) and I assume it like Hari Pahlawan . There's this one time we need to like redah a jalan yang sangat sempit with thousand of people .

I'm back - after leaving this post hanging for two days ...

Well basically , London is the first place I spent my weekend away from home. And there's this one random days when I was on the phone with my mum ( triggered by the fact that my housemate make a set of pictures hanged on the wall with the decorations. ) , I decided to ,

.
..
... BRING ALONG MY FAMILY MEMBERS HERE ! 

How even that sounds possible? I always thought it was never fair for those people who've been supporting me all these while wouldn't be able to experience what I currently experience like the cold weather and stuff. My mum can randomly whine at me and says its a tiring day plus its so hot back in Malaysia ( when I am enjoying / tortured by the cold weather here ) luls. 

So , I printed out a family photo in an A4 size and laminate it . Masa awal awal tu ingat nak print on a glossy paper je and that's it , but thinking that I am going to spend my time here ( travelling more insyaAllah ) so the small plan changed , I guess kalau laminate lagi tahan lama kot. Kot. haha. and its kinda easier to put them in any kind of place sebab keras and tahan. Lols. Haha. And I had planned this for two / a week before the trip and I kept it as a secret ( I rarely kept any secrets from my mum , well even to the extent of sharing pictures yang aku ambik dekat sini or even any kind of mails I receive , sebab my google account is kinda connected to my mom's phone - obviously I don't do the logging out part , in one way , she knows almost every single thing happening in my life , I never want my family to be left out despite the distance keeping us apart ) 

The first picture taken with my family photo was at the Oxford Street . I cried when I took those pictures ( nay my housemates took the photo lols thanks for having me and my family in your cameras ) haha. Sebab finally , its like bringing your family here ! Dulu ibu selalu cakap ;

The siblings : Ibu nak pergi mana? ( soalan wajib bila tengok ibu siap siap cantik cantik )
Ibu : Nak pergi London .

and obviously my mom repeat it for thousaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand times. And there's this one day ibu cakap 

Ibu : Dulu selalu cakap nak pergi London , ada jugak anak ibu yang akan pergi sana ( which I am , alhamdulillah already here :') ) 

I know it seems unfair gak tak boleh nak masukkan the people who've been such a great help ( behind the scene ) , like my atuk nenek ( both side ibu ayah ) , my acik acik , my pakcik makcik and all. Just so you know , if you're reading this line , you guys exist in the pictures , its just that , only the heart sees it because kalian semua dalam hati , aicewahssssss ( berguling atas marshmellows ) 

I sent those pictures before Google automatically back up the pictures. And ibu short reply touched my heart " Terima kasih ingat ibu , ingat semua sekali " 

So yeah , lepas ni , my travelling pictures would include them as well :) 

...

Balik dari London was a short tough journey , memang takkan lupa aaa lambat , rush naik tube , lari dengan Stitch kat tangan bersama beg tarik. I cry. Haha. Bila tulis balik rasa macam kelakar adventure habis hari tu , dengan nak kejar bas semua , aku yang selalu tenang ni jadi tidak tenang kah kah. Nayy. Alhamdulillah. 

Despite the wonderful challenging short weekend getaway , I personally feel grateful sebab Allah definite- kan answer by making Cardiff as my place to study / live for 3 years even aku tak pernah certain dengan choice tu , and even banyak kali mintak kat Allah , ( masa Alevels dulu ) , If I get good grades for Alevels I would go for adjustment ( for uni's in London - centre London ) , and it turned out yang Allah betul betul bagi 13 out of 15 points for Alevels which cukup cukup requirement Cardiff and tak lepas pun nak buat adjustment semua . I am so grateful Allah sets things up like that sebab only after a few days in London , deep down I know I could not stand a hectic city. Its meant to be only a weekend visit. And it strengthen my stand yang Cardiff tempat yang paling baik dari Allah :')

Now , picture time !!!



semua sebelum berangkat ni ! haha

Big Ben with family checked.


the bus from cardiff to London - loya pening in combo T.T

we stayed here , sebelah Malaysian Hall. Its veryyy nice here. 

motif gambar ; Teksi promote tourism Malaysia. The busses pun ada promote ni !

everything here is so sedapssss with many s sedaps. 

nasi campur I cry , udang sambal bersama ekor dan kepala , asam pedas ikan pari . Cry lagi.

Eye of London ( ke London Eyes taktahu aaa ) hahah ,checked !

Nasuha always want to be in the camera with me, so iLayan. haha


The Big Bennnnn.

travelling partners ! Mumtaz , Nabilah , Aishah. 

poppy flowers and the castle. Pagi nampak benda ni dalam berita , tengahari ada kat sini ehee. Ramaaaainyaaaa orang masyaAllah !

checked !

gambar tidak mengikut turutan , ini merupaakan antara gambar pertama yang diambil bersama family di sini.

time ni baru lepas makan dekat restoran malaysia Rasa Sayang pastu tengah sakit perut lols , makanya tengok dari luar je , malas nak masuk. 

Elsa , Anna , dan long lost sisters , Annazari ahhahahahhahambar sangat !

decorations dalam Harrods. Harrods tempat shopping curlass gituu dekat sini , jadi masuk pun seram sejuks iols. 

pictures taken depan Buckingham Palace. Tugu ni ada nama , lupa ! Victoria something.

Nasuha again. hahaha. Hipstur dia sekarang. Oh by the way , she's in Essex now. aww aww. 

I am glad I wore pink that day , I look bright'er in pictures hahahah.

It was a memorial day on that day , jadi ramai orang kat situ ( caption tak masuk ) haha

my beauty partner ( beauty - fan Beast uppa's hahahahhahaha kpopnyaa )

selthefies!

muka ( sila bagi caption )

The palace !

escalator tinggi , najwa jakun.

The tube. 

the only housemate pictures taken here. haha

I bought thissss ! My Baby Ji. I call him/her , tendency to be a HIM , hahah By Ji ( manja konon tu hhahahahahha bi ji abah mungg haha )

Cerita cinta Najwa dan Ji. 

I bought him at the Disney Store at the Oxford St ( Saturday malam ) . Asalnya dah tengok dia hari Jumaat , it cost me 20 pound , original price was 40 pound.And masa jumaat tu tengok , banyak sangattttt Stitch on the shelves and I was like takpelah , taknak lah. Esok tu datang balik the street , masuk Disney store , nak rasa fancied tengok disney characters ( ahhahaha motipnya ) then I saw Ji alone , sensorang ( Stitch yang banyak banyak semalam dah hilangggg dah kena jual semuanya ) and telinga besar dia tutup mata dia and dia tersorok bawah almari and rasa sedihhhhh sangat tengok dia camtu sensorang , and I guess , we're meant to be together because its the last piece , without thinking , terussss grab dia and purchase hahahhahahah


Nah satt , video , ada rakam video nah nah !

taken at the Oxford Street Najwa Jakun kbyes haha
video

Batchday !

I was supposed to sleep since we're going to London tomorrow at 10.15 am. My first #NajwaMusafir ( kah kah motipnya tajuk , lols travelog - travel sounds cliche , so I guess , #NajwaMusafir should sounds nice ) but it happened that its 7th of November ! * pop the fireworks. * and its batch dayyyy ! yeayyy ! 

( sambil play lagu Memori Tercipta Shila Amzah ) 

Meskipun dah dua puluh , despite dah miles away jauh dari bumi Malaysia , jauh dari bumi Selandar , despite lepas ni tinggal satu je generasi yang kitaorang kenal dekat Selandar , I guess , memang aku tak pernah move on . Taktahulah okay ke tak sebenarnya ni tak move on , but since it doesn't show any harm , I guess , I just carved a home for Machinants in my heart . ( the melted cheeses on top of the pizza feelings )

I don't know but I just love the batch. The people , the past , the presents seems close to my heart. So close. It was days ago when I reminisce how 'bad' we could be in the past with a best friend of mine and watching us both grow up and learn from the past mistakes , I guess those feelings are lovable. Because we both signify the changes in our life , for being able to spur what the heart feels , to have the 'ease' feelings when we gathered , cherishing the moments without the feeling of being judged , I guess I had that all kind of pleasant feeling when I'm around my Machinants. 

I must say that I personally only knows some people , only by their nicknames and overtimes having troubles remembering their actual name , or now sebab dah bertambah garis penuaan , hardly recall the 164's faces , still , when it comes to uttering " Machinants " , terus snappp ! Hati rasa macam sayang , bangga , sedih , terharu , rindu semua in combo ! 

Rindu. 

Even dekat Cardiff ( since one of my batchmate is here and we rarely meet each other since he's in the business school ) , kenkadang tu bila nampak dia , dia punya excited macam jumpa whole machinants. Eheee tipunya statement sister ! haha takdelah that kind of excited , tapi rasa macam " Eh haii machinants " hahaha apa motip pun tak paham. 


K motip dia rindu je. 2007 - 2011 , written down ,  7th November 2014

Like How It Used to Be?

Sustaining a good relationship ( staying connect , pretending you're the same person you used to be after going through different paths in life - meeting a new surrounding - a new circle of friend ) , I found its hard for me to be the person I used to be , as the process of learning requires me as  a whole ( including the mind , body and soul ) to grow up as well. 

And I could never deny at some points I do ditch some people whom I categorized as merely memories , well somehow its not you yourself who chose those people in that particular part of memories fade away , I guess the cells in the brain automatically transmit those to the relevant section in the brain , as its fading from the reality ( I mean the time I am facing now ) section.

You get what I say? I am talking about this virtually imagination on how my brain partitioned stuff ikut logik budak law. Deng ! I must have been humiliating the science stream people * bow down , I am sorry *

Somehow I feel bad about myself. Paling common , lupa pakai kata ganti nama diri sendiri dengan certain people , like we used to use aku kau then suddenly changed to kita / ( insert nama sesiapa ) and as the conversation goes down , you somehow picked that memories

" Eh aku dulu pakai aku kau dengan dia ni " and awkward. 

tapi somehow at some points , I will let the ego side of me to speak , like how concern you can be , thinking on how to sustain a good relation when other party does not even bother about your existence anymore. And I guess they must have been going through the same " memories washed away "  phase.  And I guess I live in many people's part of memories section. And somehow waiting to be deleted in that people's life. 

At the end of the day I know , things are not going to be the same , like how it used to be. You just need to accept , we all meet new people and the process of memories fading away seems normal to anyone. And the cycle goes , you'll meet new people - perhaps somebody is calling you with your unfamiliar names just because you wanted to change the rhythm like how I want people to call me Najwa instead of Anis during high school and here , since Najwa sounds hard to pronounce , I usually introduce myself as Anis. with the stress syllable of 'A' instead of ' E' . Aku penat haih betulkan , my name is Anis , A for Apple. haha.

serious sikit najwa. Jangan menerawang.  

Aku rasa aku tak boleh marah bila orang dah lupa how close we used to be before. Sebab kadang aku sendiri lupa nak cherish the moment at the right timing , I missed the timing isn't it? I guess its a yes. 

Mungkin aku / kita ada limitation people yang kita keep close in contact dan mungkin kapasiti yang aku boleh sustain dalam satu masa cuma beberapa manusia. Yang aku harap , aku included dalam vital list hidup diaorang to be sustained and kept close. Supaya its a mutual relation - where both parties exist do commit. 

Takpelah. Kita manusia kot. Masing masing own defect. Aku pun tak boleh nak deny kau ada hidup kau. And aku pun kena jugak kot  terima kenyataan and pat my own shoulder , and move on. 

Moga sentiasa bawah jagaan Dia. 

Tak bersua di dunia nyata ,
Bersama dalam doa , 
aku kira itu cinta. Takpelah

Sharing Circle - Surah Al Insan (The Man) and Hadis 1 ( Hadis 40 Imam Nawawi )

This surah basically discussed about the existence of human .

We kinda diverted the discussion yesterday with various topic , and one of them is Qiamulail , when we came across this verse

76:26

Dan (dengan apa keadaan pun maka) pada sebahagian dari waktu malam sujudlah kepada Tuhan (dengan mengerjakan sembahyang), dan (seboleh-bolehnya) bertasbihlah memujiNya (dengan mengerjakan sembahyang Tahajjud), pada sebahagian yang panjang dari waktu malam.

Since the winter is approaching , the night become longer and we shared this one saying ;

Winter is one of the best season Allah grant us , because the day is short for us to fast and the night is long for us to do our ibadah. 

exactly thats how it supposed to be. 

You know how it feels like untuk dapat kekuatan bangun malam , solat malam? Out of billions of people in the world , Allah choose you to be the one ? Be the special one? 

Kita kadang selalu je bangun awal. Then most of the time we choose to procastinate on the bed bila tengok , belum Subuh lagi ni or even alarm belum bunyi * k boleh tidur balik yeayy * , tanpa kita sedar kadang 10 minit before subuh , kalau kita bangun and perform solat tahajjud , it still considered as Qiam. 

I always have this kind of feeling , even ada berjuta umat atas muka bumi , when it comes to Qiamulail , being the one yang Allah pilih untuk bangun dan berdoa - I feel that feeling of being ' special' 

Teruslah berusaha untuk selalu rasa istimewa di mata Allah. Let's Qiam !

...

Hadis 1. 

Basically , the basic knowledge regarding this Hadis 40 is all Hadith sahih , berkaitan dengan akidah and this week we discuss about the first hadis. 

"Bahawa sesungguhnya setiap amalan itu bergantung kepada niat, dan bahawa sesungguhnya bagi setiap orang apa yang dia niatkan. Barangsiapa yang hijrahnya menuju kepada Allah dan RasulNya, maka hijrahnya kepada Allah dan RasulNya. Barangsiapa yang hijrahnya kerana dunia yang dia mahu mencari habuannya, atau kerana seorang perempuan yang dia mahu kahwininya, maka hijrahnya ke arah perkara yang ditujuinya itu."

Setiap amalan bergantung pada niat. Purify our niat. 

Make it a practice , bangun pagi pergi kelas , instead of going to class back and forth kosong , niatkan setiap pagi , kita nak menuntut ilmu kerana Allah. Like nak mandi , kita niatkan bersuci untuk Allah. Like masak untuk housemate ke , kita niat nak menjamu orang makan dan bersedekah insyaAllah , supaya makanan yang masuk dalam badan tu jadi sumber tenaga untuk orang tu beribadah pada Allah. 

walaaaa cycle of good deeds :) Moga sama sama dapat saham baik akhirat :)

Niat itu penting ! and remember , if its for bad stuff , NIAT TAK PERNAH DAN TAK AKAN MENGHALALKAN CARA :)


Sharing Circle - Surah Al - Furqan ( The Criterian )

Focus tadabbur ( means , to ponder upon , reflect ) surah is ayat 63 till the end of the surah , ayat 77.

Basically we discussed about " Ciri - ciri hamba yang Allah kasihi "


25- 63:  Dan hamba-hamba al-Rahman (Yang Maha Mengasihani) itu (ialah) orang yang berjalan di atas bumi dengan rendah hati, dan apabila orang jahil menegur mereka, maka mereka mengucapkan kata-kata “salam”.  
25- 64:  Dan orang yang bermalam dengan bersujud dan berdiri kepada Rab (Tuhan) mereka.   
25- 65:  Dan orang yang berkata: "Rabbana (wahai Tuhan kami)! Jauhkanlah azab Jahanam daripada kami, sesungguhnya azabnya sangat mengerikan.”   
25- 66:  Sesungguhnya ia (Jahanam itu) seburuk-buruk tempat menetap dan tempat kediaman.  
25- 67:  Dan orang yang apabila membelanjakan, mereka tidak berlebih-lebihan, dan tidak (pula) bakhil, melainkan di tengah-tengah antara yang demikian. 
25- 68:  Dan orang yang tidak mempertuhankan yang lain beserta Allah, dan tidak membunuh jiwa yang diharamkan Allah, kecuali dengan hak, dan tidak berzina. Dan sesiapa yang melakukan demikian itu, nescaya dia mendapat dosa.   
25- 69:  Akan dilipat gandakan azab untuknya pada hari kiamat, dan dia akan kekal dalamnya, dalam keadaan terhina.   
25- 70:  Kecuali orang yang bertaubat, beriman dan beramal salih; maka mereka itulah akan diganti oleh Allah kejahatannya dengan kebajikan. Dan Allah adalah al-Ghafur (Maha Pengampun), lagi al-Rahim (Maha Mengasihani).  
25- 71:  Dan sesiapa yang bertaubat dan beramal salih, maka sesungguhnya dia bertaubat kepada Allah dengan taubat yang sebenar-benarnya.   
25- 72:  Dan orang yang tidak memberikan persaksian palsu, dan apabila mereka melalui perkara yang sia-sia, mereka lalui (sahaja) dengan (sikap yang) mulia.  
25- 73:  Dan orang yang apabila diberi peringatan dengan ayat-ayat Rab (Tuhan) mereka, tidaklah mereka tunduk kepadanya sebagai orang yang pekak dan buta.  
25- 75:  Mereka itulah orang yang dibalaskan dengan martabat yang tinggi kerana kesabaran mereka, dan mereka disambut dengan penghormatan dan ucapan “salam” di dalamnya (syurga).   
25- 76:  Mereka kekal di dalamnya. Itulah sebaik-baik tempat menetap dan tempat kediaman.

25- 77:  Katakanlah: "Rab (Tuhan)ku tidak memperdulikan kamu, melainkan jika ada ibadah kamu, (tetapi bagaimana ada ibadah kamu), sedangkan kamu mendustakan? Justeru, pastilah (kamu) kelak (mendapat azab).” 

Terjemahan ayat 63 - 77. 

Dalam ni , ada satu doa yang selalu kita dengar imam baca , 

25:74

Dan orang yang berkata: "Rabbana (wahai Tuhan kami)! Anugerahkanlah kepada kami isteri-isteri kami dan keturunan kami sebagai penyejuk mata (kami), dan jadikanlah kami imam (pemimpin) bagi orang yang bertakwa.”  

Basically its all clearly stated , ciri ciri hamba yang Allah kasih. Lets be one !