April is ending

April is ending very soon and very soon I am moving back to Melaka , and will be travelling over weekend for revision. Its a bit hassle of travelling but its after I have been weighing the pros and cons , the cost and savings , and the surrounding , whether it will be helpful for me to focus on my studies. Well after all the considerations taken into account, I seek advice from my parents, they approve it , hence explaining why I am moving back to the hometown.

Soon enough someone is going to be 24 in May hewww 😝 Sounds legit ey 24 on 24th May haha

Obviously not a very minimalistic kind of person when it comes to packing, I stayed here only for like 7 months but I swear my stuff is just MASSIVE.

Yow babyji lets go back homeeeee

 I mean most of the spaces taken for books alone. I have 2 luggages of books - textbooks, story books, more revisions book come today * facepalm * . Whats even funnier, I have the guts to say to Diy ( and my parents too ) that I only have like two big bags but here I am end up with four big bags * rolling on the floor roll back *

I got back from class at about 10 something just now, after having class since 2 pm. The second half session is seriously NO JOKE I was so so sleepy that I guess I unconsciously slept and miss like one question discussed. It was not long after that the lecturer gave us a break phew I needed that time off. Perhaps everyone is dozing off as well since its been one hectic day of Civil Procedure.

For the past one month, I have been mending the walls of my heart, no matter how focused I can be in class, some things seems to burdened my heart, like as if I didn't let things go when I should. And its where I randomly jot down inside my notebook on the lesson I've learnt for the past few weeks,

  1. When you love, show , don't let people assume neither over think things. Love although we said can be felt by heart, some things are meant to be affirmed and express in words. That's what I learnt from someone I named M lol all the initials. I reread the conversation we had and at many many points I was being really cold , I do love - but I am too cold at expressing it. And I guess its where I learn to give as much as I get. It shouldn't be a fair thing if someone loves more, it should be love each other equally. 
  2. Be genuine and generous about your feelings. Expressing that you care and love someone , some may perceive it as selling yourself too low because you love more ( sometimes more than you should ) but I guess there's just no harm of doing so. Whats the big deal if someone loves more, or express more. 
  3. Find someone whom you're very comfortable to be with, even in silence. For the past few weeks, I thought I have fund someone whom I grow fond towards. I was so comfortable to be around this person even to the point where I just wanted to be on the phone while I am falling asleep. And the person was really patient entertaining that clingy side of me. I know at that point , I learnt that this should be one of the traits I seek in someone, just someone who's comfortable to be with in silence. 
  4. Refine your definition of happiness. I am reminded of the few post I posted earlier, about a friend of mine who's scared of letting go because she can't bear the loneliness of not texting, or not having someone to talk about the day. Well to be honest I am currently living in that phase, hence explaining why the heart is aching. But I know I needed to refine that , being alone doesn't mean being lonely or vice versa. 
  5. Not all the good things meant to put your heart at rest. Well its a total bonus if something it does. Some good things requires waiting , requires you to take a leap of faith and leave things behind, something good might be you letting things that are so dear to you. Hence no matter how bad things turn out to be, its perhaps just a pitstop before you see the rainbow beneath the silver lining. 
  6. Learn to let go. Sometimes it’s what’s best and some things are just not meant to be. Hence this is me letting go , and M in case you’re reading this through , I totally understand why you choose to be silent , I know it’s for your own sake and I will never blame you for that , live well ! 
Haha enough of ramblings, I jot all these main points inside the notebook earlier to make myself stay sane and alert hahaha , well it helps :D
 Love, the'ann

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