Lets ponder why and why.

Aku rasa aku dah kena mula menulis semula dalam bahasa Melayu kerana aneh sekali hari ini sahaja ada beratus view dari Amerika Syarikat , dan nyata aku cuma beberapa kali sahaja menyebut perkataan United States , which nak bagitahu ge'ef aku dua orang belajar dekat sana tu je hahah . And most of the posts viewed are in Malay language , you creepy people stop viewing my blog ( like how Russian viewed my blog last month , I don't speak Russian guys , even a direct translate will make my writing sounds really funny and I don't even intend of sharing anything for the whole world to take note 

* dah tu kenapa kau tak private je blog kau ? * eh suka aku lah haha

* still writing in English . I just need to polish 'em sorrayh not sorry

Facebook certainly a pro to flatter people , even if you're not as what they described you as , you are very incline to just accept it harhar. And goes 

' Awwww really ' 

So yesterday I bugged people to join the thing that had been inside my mind for like 10 hours , it was an easy problem statement 

Fitrah ialah sesuatu perkara yang sejahtera dengan hati. 

Fitrah according to the discussion yesterday is something that never change. Like fitrah attracted to opposite gender , fitrah in short can be defined as something which supposed to belong to a person. Like fitrah seorang perempuan tu dia prone kepada benda benda yang cantik ( like choosing a laptop based on its colour rather than the specs haha ) ( contoh kasar ) . 

So considering it's something that( supposedly )  feels really close to your heart , going back to it ( fitrah ) should be easing for you. However I came across a status of a person , that says , 

Dia sangat penat berbalik kepada fitrah , 

considering the facts , you might understand why its tiring, so we debated about it ( because I was keen to understand the matter with psychology element in it , guided with what religion said ) and we met an endless point * we were swayed away by the definition of fitrah  

and Kak Aisyah's answer ( insyaAllah my future murabbi )  mesmerised me , 

She said , 

Fitrah never change , it stays the same  ( all of us agreed on this )  . But what changes is the condition of our heart. She shared with us Hadith 27 ( from Hadis 44 Imam Nawawi ) that mentioned ; sin is something that tickles our heart , like how each time we're doing something bad , and the heart feels uneasy about it. And the more sin you do , it adds more black dots to it ( not literally but figuratively , titik hitam gituuuu ) and that's what makes it harder for us to get back to the fitrah. So to be able to get back to what you supposed to feel / practice is to cleanse your heart , get rid of the black dots.

How?

By reading , reading Quran , mingle with good people , seek for the surrounding that helps you to grow up healthily ( emotionally ) , and many more . 

So we accepted that fitrah is something that supposed to feel so close to you . but due to the circumstances mentioned above , that's what makes it hard , and tiring for you to go back to where you supposed to stay. 

And my mind was rest assured with a very easing answer. 

* * * 

That was one. 

Next was about a video that went viral , about a kid beating up other kid , its horrible I swear. And most people tagged Polis Diraja Malaysia to take action on the bully. But later I found someone came up with the flip side of the coin. It turns out that the bully was verbally abused as he lost his father and being mocked as an orphan. I was not even trying to justify the violence he did but to understand why he's acting such way. 

Because to me , we're talking about kids here , most kids are innocent enough about their behaviour , I don't say all but most. Innocent here means , they most probably have one direct transparent reason why they are behaving in such ways. Unlike us adults , when we're behaving badly , it may be caused by our past , our ego , silent motives , in other words , we're perhaps a pro in twisting our stories why we behaved in certain ways , but that rarely applies on kids. Like how paedophile cases where  kids behaving in certain ways to show that they're molested. 

Some might says , no matter what the reason is , its just too much. This is where education plays an important role. Some kids are mature enough to be able to control their emotions but some are just less lucky than the others , he might not be told / exposed / showed by anyone on how to control his anger , and it might be that he's been holding back for quite some time and that's the only time he burst out his anger. 

and this had indirectly gave a big lesson to most of the adults who shared and commented negatively on the video , which to educate the alpha generation , perhaps the Zee and the Y gen too , to not make fun of the others , as bullying  does not only caters physical contact , but also verbally. I saw earlier when someone make fun of other woman just because she exceeded a sum of possibilities. Whatever motives she had in her mind , its just so wrong to make it viral that way , perhaps she was too eager about teaching math which it can be good , but not that way , I don't favour it to happen that way. 

And I hope that she asked for forgiveness for what she had done. And there's even people who said 

'Weh benda kecik ni pun nak sentap , chill lah.' 

Yes , it might be small in your eyes - perhaps invisible to your eyes , you never know how big it can be to her. You were right that people need to tough up , not to take things on social medias seriously , but for some , its very hard for them to draw the distinction line between what's serious and what's not.

I used to be verbally abused and I bet most of the person who did that ( which still I can picture them clearly inside my mind ) might said they were just playing , why take things seriously? For them , it does not even something to care about , when it was the cause of my tears and it hold a big space inside my head thinking how can I escape this torturing surrounding. 

And sometimes you just need to respect people and that's it. I reflected once in the past , where someone I knew were emotionally affected because somebody forgot her birth date. It might not be an issue for people who don't really care , but it can be an issue for someone else , and you just need to respect it ( and yeah , take notes on the little details about the person )

Because , no matter what , this whats makes the world works , better. If somebody care less , somebody else care more. Some can be easy going , some can be sensitive. And there's nothing wrong about being who you are. We just need to embrace the diversities of characters exist around us. Not to simply condemn on it. 

I remembered a session with Teach for Malaysia ( TFM )  during  Kalsom and Small Changes ( I forgot the term ) but its about how your mind perceive something to happen in certain ways but there's no right or wrong about it. Like some families are very havoc while they're eating , and some families prefer a calm and organised table while they're eating , there are nothing wrong neither guideline on how it supposed to happened , its just us , there's a need of assimilating the differences. 

And most of the things I said here are easier said than done but I just had to create some awareness and I need to remind myself too . Because we're humans and we make mistakes.