Genuinely Happy

You'll bloom like the flowers do. 

My brain cells had constantly pushed me to write something here because apparently I am not occupied with something that needs constant attention. Nothing major apart from house chores and some matters I am attending at the moment.

I uninstalled my Facebook application to find that it's so hard to reinstall it back because I am not connected to the Wifi , don't get me started on that lousiest connection. I'm better without it rather than getting so hyped for that slow connection. 

Maybe its better that ways since I am trying to go through a phase of detaching. Thought of deactivating it permanently but I read so many good stuff over there, and plus I have to get updates on the matter concerning my CLP - hence I activated the profile again for my own good. But the non-existence of application did helped me a lot in toning down the medium addiction (lol got to clarify this isn't it) . 

So far, life has been offering me wonders of opportunities to give back to the society , and to basically pays people visit in life. 

Some days I found myself getting into a random plan to attend one of my dearest sister's wedding , I was not even thinking my whereabouts on the weekend on Thursday, and its only after 3 o'clock on Friday I was texting my friends to see whether I can make my sudden plan viable. And at 5 I boarded the bus planning what will happen in my life for the next 3 hours. 

I guess these are the things I am able to enjoy in Malaysia ; Sudden (travelling) plan because obviously the ticket rates are the same all the time, I mean for the buses. I guess at some points in my life , I need to let the circumstances to guide me. I was undecided whether to stay one more day in Kuala Lumpur on Saturday, but I guess I am just so worn out for the day that I decided to take the bus home. 

I am not always up for these kind random things but so long it does not disturb other people's plan , and people around me are being supportive towards my hustling life, I should take this opportunity to wander around. I don't always see myself 'free' to juggle into different fun things in life. 

At the wedding I mentioned above, I met familiar faces I missed . Well I have said it once that I thought that the place matters, well it does , but the people are rather more significant - that give the vibes to the place , making it meaningful than ever.

A dearest sister of mine asked , I think more like addressing her concern about growing up. 

Its like both question and a statement, that says about

how tiring adulthood can be. 

And in reply I said, my life has been constantly changing, I experienced major changes in a very fast pace but yet my heart hardly moving on from the days I had in Cardiff. 

In other words, I am not even resting for the life challenges and changes but yet the heart somehow half of it is there. I love the life I am living, but maybe parts of me also love the life I was living before. 

Don't get me wrong, this is a very subjective matter to begin with , I mean despite half of me still in the UK for all the good she was offering , I gave my heart and soul to my job and my studies. And it explains why all these law jargon keeps appearing out from nowhere - I was changing the prawn-less condiments earlier to an anchovies and nuts condiments that the Civil Procedure pleading chapter popped out inside my head , which amendment on pleadings shall not change its character 

I am like, seriously najwa? Are you even serious huh? 

Regardless, I am enjoying it because I know its there inside my head , certainly going to be useful in the future. 

Apart from that, I am trying to train myself to be active at this hour , because I need to do something I see as  future-wise matter in the couple of days before I am going to the pre-departure camp the next morning. I need to at least dedicate 2 hours plus of my life for that , so finger crossed lets try to stay awake HA-HA

I did some math exercise yesterday, yes you read me right, I am doing math. I am so surprised with my ability to complete a 40 sets of Math questions in like 20 minutes. And I got almost a 80% for the question, I left some of the questions that concerns a bit complex quadratic function on graphs , these x and y no longer make sense inside these rusty brain when it comes to numbers. 

I mean numbers alone is forgiveable, but adding all these unknown x and y to it , like why you guys make it hard ? leave the numbers alone. 

Its been a while since I really enjoy writing, I mean I am always writing but often I paused at lines trying to generate words into sentences, but today I am writing smoothly. Maybe because finally I felt there's some thrills going on inside my life ( as if ) , but I am really happy when I am writing these down. 

I am not sure on how my September going to be , but I had randomly applied for jobs over LinkedIn - I mean its fun to apply for the easy-apply kind of jobs and when the notification said my application was being viewed I am like, did I do the right thing? 

I am reminded of the opportunity that came before me earlier, when a recruiter private message me on LinkedIn to see whether I am interested to join the company ( that I have been eyeing since pre-Alevel days post SPM days ) but at that time I have vowed myself to give my full attention on CLP , and I had to say sorry and extend the opportunity to a friend of mine. 

I guess my mom is already worried about me having no one special in my life that she keeps asking me questions like whether I know anyone close back in Cardiff. Ugh lol I only have that two last standing men in law class and I got no one, apart from having a crush on a Canadian guy for three years HA-HA . Perhaps I am being too comfortable being in my own bubble. A strong bubble that floats in the air, hardly popped. LOL

That's it for now, hope to see myself writing again. I don't know who even read this piece , I mean who even go for blogs these days, I am perhaps among the 4% of people who make this site alive. I never know if some days these writing matters , but as for now I am writing just for the sake of writing and to let my mind speaks about the things I hardly expressed to human. 

well humans are always occupied and interested in matters that matters to them, my life stories won't fall into the interesting poll. Okay why did I end this negatively ~~~

In this very fast pace life, I think there's a need for me to take things slow and jot down all these little conversations and events . Lets be genuine about living this life , deep inside you're very content Anis , lets give meaning to this life. 💖

My thoughts are with the people who's affected by the earthquake in Lombok , may everything be eased over there :'(

Lets be genuinely HAPPY Anis Najwa because you deserve it :) 

Love, the'ann