To you , whom I wish to be by my side

One of the things I used to tell myself , seek for someone who will read my random rambles on the blog , because to me it’s one of the vivid sign someone is actually being interested in knowing me deeper.

I may say that I speaks best through words , but I guess not when it comes to communicating with someone. Perhaps it’s been so long since I had a relationship with an opposite gender , so I often speaks things which I don’t really feel or really mean.

So I’ll end up feeling dissatisfied about the unspoken things I had in mind. And not wanting to sound overtly clingy - or perhaps too complicated , I’ll choose to write things down at other places. In books , in my tumblr , or even drafts of blog posts.

I really hope someday I’m blessed with someone who puts an effort in wanting to know me more as a person and celebrate the way I am now. Which I guess it’s not so much to ask ( I guess )

Someone whom I wish , to read through this piece of thing is perhaps not reading. It kinda saddens me a bit but what with the fuss of being sad over very little things. Hahahaha I just hate myself ( a bit ) for expecting lol I should have known isn’t it.

I dislike it when I keep checking and I actually had those free times to do the checking , to see all the last seen. Ugh you said you’re moving on Najwa what happen to you. Just whattt T.T

Somedays I read over articles that says , if you love somebody or miss them - just say it and just be the love you wanted to be despite whatever treatment you received in return

So fuelled up to just break the icy barriers then suddenly I read through articles that says don’t waste too much of my time giving so much for someone who least cares. I can’t say someone don’t really care ( or should I )

Ugh why I’m stuck in this love sickness motion , bring me back to days before June last year , so I’ll be free from all this. I used to be someone so carefree , who freed myself from being affected by all these tangling feelings , but now I’m just stuck.

It’s not that I don’t enjoy this butterflies I had in my stomach - of course it’s one of the good feeling that keeps me caution , indirectly it gives a motivation for you to stay err presentable lol , but sometimes when it gets so complicated , I can’t really figure who am I again

Dear someone whom I wish to be by my side in the future,

I hope you’re reading this , to the very least I know you’re actually into me. I may not be physically attractive to many ,  but I hope you’ll see the best in me for my values. Enough just by being the most attractive one to you alone haha , lol nevertheless I own an appealing upward curve on my face , I made great jokes too mehewhew.

I can be one random person who will tell you the most random things out of the blue , and I hope you’ll come to accept that side of me. I may not know who you are now , or where you be , but in case you’re reading this , let’s focus on our dreams ! Be the best version of you , and later someday if we’re fated to meet , let’s meet in the best version of ourselves !

I’ll appreciate the very little gestures from you. The little notes of good morning , a short hello in your busy schedule , or even little notes saying I’m beautiful ( miahahahhaha ) ( I’m allowed to say whatever this I want on my page aite? Let me be vain for a moment please )

I’m so flawed with so many flaws , but let’s be better each time.

I’ll be sharing with you so many un furr- gettable meow’ments with you haha 😆 I’m sorry I’ll be such a cat to you , I’m just so clingy as a person sobs

There’s just so many things I wish to say and share with you. Till next time , take care :)

K writing this ewwwwwwwwww me hahaha kbye


Love,  the'ann