So I've done some sorts of personality test previous days because I feel like figuring out myself , feel lost maybe. Mungkin sekadar sesi Kenal-Diri. Feel like having an orientation mode : siapa nama awak-Awak suka apa- Awak orang yang macam mana and the list goes down . Muehehe.
I am kind of terkezuut when three or four test I did , if you ever did it earlier, there's a part we call introvert and extrovert.
I'm an INTROVERT .
Whattaaaa? * muka tikus * I never ever be an introvert while I'm in highschool mann. Never Evaaaaaa O.O It's like, pehal personality test jadi cenggini. Telah ku jawab soalan dengan teliti dan tawadhu' meskipun ada sekor dua hekor perkataan yang buat aku garu kepala .
Okay lemme tell yuu what is INTROVERT? * do I sound like cikgu kaunselor gitewww * *google-mode*
1. reserved person: a shy person who tends not to socialize much
2. somebody focusing on own self: somebody whose feelings and thoughts are directed inward
Me? Reserved? Not socialize Much? Lawak petala apa ni.
Then I started to wonder. Hormonal distraction ke eh. Since when I am an introvert. Since when. Then tadaaaa, after a few days figuring : Since Masuk INTEC. For serious. I started to analyze. Yes, I've become a very very reserved person. I've lessen my socialize skill.
1.Setiap hari datang kelas like veghhy veghhy early at 6.30 am . Faktor : Tak boleh nampak ramai orang beratur when the clock strikes 7.00 am . Alone. With the headphones.
2. I went to class alone. Nak dekat akhir semester, I got Chuaa to teman me :) <-- glad faces . Bukak laptop. Masuk waktu rehat , I even choose what time to come down. I would go down around 10.30 macam tu . Faktor : Tak nak beratur and tak nak tengok orang. Like again? I'd pack my food and eat upstairs in the class. Memang sangat jarang ye nak pujuk diri sendiri nak duduk cafe.
3. When its time to go back, I'll just go back. Ignoring persekitaran. Exclude my law mates.
And if you ask me, kenal tak budak course lain? I can list it down for you. If ada, it would be my housemate or club mates ( tak ada sebab I don't even bother to enter one ) and if ever I remember, it would be their faces and rarely their names. My bad.
All these things matters to me. I am changing. Like 100%. I am no longer me in high school. Like a stranger to myself. I never realize this. So could I blame social networks for this? I could say YES, because I've been to talking and expressing to a dead things with no souls and heart to value like Twitter? Or even this Blog? Or even what? Friendster? * ehh tetiba* haha , I realize I've been to attached to this whole interaksi-alam-maya.
My aim now is not achieving to be an Extrovert again. But to be less introvert. I'd like to mingle around. Mix with people. Gather fresh ideas. Broadening my friendlist in a real world. See? I couldn't have any satisfaction for having thousands friends in the facebook or gathering hundreds of followers in twitter. And because I know that : they will make me, more introvert. More reserved. Anti-socialize. Boo.
Pray for me.
ps. I miss talking in public like so much. I miss my debate team. I miss my social skills stuff. I miss the critical-thinking moment. Erghhh.
Who ever read this and they meet me in reality. Mari kita bertegur sapa. Haha. I don't bite.